i don't really do new-year's resolutions, i prefer to do a word for the year. last year i just could not get one, but in 2008 my word was 'grow'. the word thing was inspired by ali.
my word for 2010 is 'overcome'. or rather the afrikaans word 'oorwin' that literally means 'overwin'. i like the positivity of the 'win' part, that inspires visions of me standing on a winner's podium...
there are lots of loose ends in my life, that trip me up. unfinished tasks that drain my energy. many of the stemming from my 'previous life'. i am often angry at ronnie for leaving me with so much unfinished, unorganised, unarranged. yet i am not doing so much better myself. and often i wake up in the night and lie awake and stress about the undone. it drains my energy, and fills me with fear.
a few months ago, in july 2009, i decided to give myself a year to fix, finish, finalise. and i did manage to do a lot. amongst others, sorting out car papers and license documents, and selling the old cars and buying newer ones, were part of that. and this year i want to do more. instead of having to tackle a huge project, i decided to break them up into smaller tasks. and to try and set myself a 'task of the week'. some tasks take more than one week, and some are quick and easy, and take only a few minutes. doing it this way, made me feel more in control, and less overwhelmed.
part of the visualisation of the word, is this:
i like the fact that there are mountains, and they look pretty daunting, and big. but on the other side is a valley of peace.
so: i want to overcome the physical 'mountains' in my life. i am not going to list them all here, but i do have a list of specifics. most of them are administrative and organisational.
but also: i want to overcome other things too. overcome some bad habits. procrastinating. paralysing myself with fear. doubting myself.
overcome fear: fear of failure. fear of success. fear of not having enough.
i hope look forward to coming back to this post at the end of 2010, and reflect on just how much i have overcome. overwon.
do you have a word for 2010? what is it? did you blog it? tell me, i love to know!
love, jacki
